Male hang-outs: Do women have anything to fear?

We are cool! –by: JIDE ANIMASHUN

I quite understand the fear that a lot of women nurse when their partners tell them they want to hang out with the boys. It is quite understanding too for some reason for girls to tend to baffle over the idea of guys hang­ing out and conversing. I think the reason for this is that most guys tend to keep these interac­tions private though there is real­ly nothing to it. It is just the way we are. You will hardly ever find a photo album anywhere, especially on social media to show what hap­pened the whole night. You won’t hear gossip for the next few weeks about who said what, and you won’t be invited to tag along if you’re a babe. A typical day when guys hang out together is usually like this. During the day we might go outside and play some hoops with a basketball or watch a foot­ball game together. We may go to the pool, or just do something dumb like sitting somewhere and watching the day roll by while saying nothing but just basking in the euphoria of people passing by.
If it’s later in the day we may get hungry and go in to micro­wave some frozen left-over foods or pick up some snacks to chew. After ‘dinner’ we may watch some dumb macho films on the televi­sion, play some video games, or go hang out at a bar somewhere down the street or a club. The night typically ends sometime in the ‘AM’ with someone falling asleep. At this point we turn off what we’re doing, go home and hit the sack. In all these, there’s really nothing all that interesting or deep. I think the main point of guys hanging out is to just be doing something with some­one. Guys tend to get satisfac­tion through doing something, not talking and letting out some hidden emotion. Sure, there are those times that guys may get really close and talk about some­thing that’s been on their mind or bugging them. There’s really nothing wrong with talking to a friend about something import­ant. We have feelings too. The difference is that it comes off in a different manner.
Honestly speaking, you’ll hard­ly ever catch two guys looking at each other eye to eye and discuss­ing a hard breakup with a box of tissues or talking about the dif­ferent wifey problems they may be having. That is really not the stuff with which we are made off. It really is not that macho for us and one can’t be swaggering about with that kind of chip on our shoulders. Instead you’ll find two guys playing video games talking about something they’re going through and letting it out in a different manner. I don’t want to say guys’ friendships are less important to them. It’s just that everything comes across in a different manner. Guys throw hints to each other and that’s all it takes. We understand each other and we support each oth­er no matter what happens. We know each other inside out and if there’s a problem between you and your partner, then chances are we know without being told but we really feel it’s something that the hang out really doesn’t need because you can solve it all on your own.
I guess this leads us to the question of what guys talk about at these hang outs that makes it so special to us for us to want to spend precious time we should be spending with our partners with our male friends. Time spent with a dude is usually free of the judg­ments women sometimes pass on each other or on us and that can be liberating when it comes to guy on guy conversations. It’s a drama free relationship that’s low on ex­pectations and high on fun. What’s not to love about that? Most of the time, it’s a spontaneous fun filled getaway for us and we can discuss everything and anything that comes to mind without be­coming too sensitive about the backlash from talking too much. Guys just connect by being there and doing things together. In fact, most of the times, few words are necessary to communicate. We re­ally don’t have the time to gossip or discuss much of our personal life or our partner. We just want to spend time together bonding and creating that childlike atmo­sphere we used to have as kids in a somewhat grown-up way. And because of these, women don’t re­ally have anything to fear about us hanging out.
Dubious intentions –by: YEMISI ADENIRAN

To hang out is to be with friends whether male or female to catch some fun. Hangouts are times away from the regular official environments. As implied, it is not a place where serious work is done; it is a place where fun takes place in all kinds of forms.
Where do people hangout? Most of the time, people hang out at clubs or hotels because these are places where relaxation takes place. A place where there is fun music of different types, a place where all kinds of dance that range from normal to nude types take place.
Besides, whenever anyone goes out with friends, he or she does not only make new friends on his own but gets introduced to new friends as well.
Peer group risk. While there is nothing to fear when men go out to catch fun with their counter­parts, the risk of a bad peer on an innocent one is quite high. For women, they just gist about our relationships and gossip about our friends. The story, however, is not the same with men. When they go hanging out with their male friends, your guess is just as good as mine. Unlike their female counterparts, who may not nec­essarily be interested in making new acquaintances, men make new friends. These friends, most times are female because they be­lieve no fun is complete without the presence of women.
Meanwhile, because it is an all-male outing, it is definitely their comfort zone. They are free to talk and even touch without cau­tion. Even if a man is born-again or just a reserved person, he is likely to fall prey to he pitfall of a ready-made woman who is simply brought on-board by one of his ad­venturous friends. So, you see, it is simply risky and not advisable that men go hanging outs alone with their friends. When men are not with their spouses, they are easily influenced and throw cautions into the wind after all, “if other friends are doing it, why not,” they will easily conclude.
It’s a booze free time. Male hand outs, whether you like it or not will feature beer or wine. If a man does not take beer, he will take wine and this will contain a measure of alcohol. Before long, they will get tipsy and get careless with any woman or even a danger­ous man around. But if he were to be with his spouse or partner, he is likely to be well managed and if there is a need to throw any cau­tion into the winds, why not? Af­ter all he is safe.
It’s trap time. Men fall into traps of their dubious friends un­knowingly. Many have fallen prey to poisons from an envious friend or like earlier on mentioned, a female trap by the same kind of friend. When men hang out alone without their spouses, they are again open to dubious businesses that can land them in serious trou­bles.
It’s a place of reconnecting to old habits. The man is connected with old habits that he has once abandoned. It’s a place where bad habits are reawakened and rekin­dled. It is a place where one easi­ly lose guards. There are cases of men who on such dates have been involved in two-some three-some sex which he ordinarily wouldn’t have been part of.
Overall, it is safer for men to hang out with their female friends than male ones. Besides, It is more responsible and healthier. If you call male hangouts a scare on wom­en, you may not be far away from the truth because women most times, want to protect their men from danger all the time. They see more and smell danger from afar.